clever minx

It's been a while

My mind had been so clouded with stress and uneasiness that things went unnoticed. The website sat for days, weeks with blank pages and comments searching for an author. The dishes piled up, friends caught me disappearing for days, bill collectors calling, dust gathering on everything I meant to do.... And then the opportunity came. With one conversation, it all seemed so clear. I will do it. I will be free again... I will be young again..... I will begin again. I heard my happiness on the other end of the line, and the things that had become so difficult in the last few months seemed so simple. I don't know what I'm going to do with my life. I don't know if I will ever know. When you are young, you think you have everything figured out...... the older you get, the more you realize you may never figure anything out..... and the more you think that might be okay. I may not finish school. I may not ever be a professional musician. I may not ever have enough money to pay my bills on time. But now I know that I can be happy and I can find the things in life that will make it okay. Things are never going to be perfect, but they can be good. Things ARE good.

I apologize for lately disappearing, and I apologize for the vagueness of my entries this year. One day everyone will know what I've been going through and they can smile with me knowing that it is over..... but for now I will continue to be uncharacteristically introverted-- Just know that if you haven't heard from me in a while, it doesn't mean I don't love you. It just means that for once I'm taking some much needed time for myself, and when I come out again...... hopefully there will be a remnant of that girl that you all know and love.
word to my homies.